Cyber Guide

We are in dire need of a Design / DevOps / Security guru who can help tame the wild internet.  We want someone with 10+ years of experience in all of the below skills; and who is ideally a Burner who understands the passion we have towards our art project.

While you will primarily be responsible for maintaining our digital aura, you may occasionally be called upon to service the needs of our core team.  Familiarity with all server and desktop operating systems is therefore a necessity.

  • Web design – HTML5, JavaScript, CSS, AJAX, PHP, Java, Ruby, ColdFusion, DreamWeaver, Drupal, VBS, IIS, Node.js, MongoDB, Redis
  • Systems Administration – CentOS, Ubuntu, Slackware, EC2, OpenBSD, Windows Vista, Windows Server 2003, Oracle, MSSQL, AmigaOS, iOS, OS X, CP/M, PalmOS, Android, Netware 3.15
  • Quality Assurance – You must be a perfectionist to your very core, as mistakes will not be tolerated.
  • SEO – Search Engine Optimization – Ours should be the only site on the internet that Google/Yahoo/Bing shows when someone searches for Caravancicle.
  • DMCA – We need someone who can utilize DMCA notices to purge the internet of all the bad things people are saying about us.  It’s mean, so it has to be illegal, right?
  • Available on short notice at all times of day or night.  We have had tech problems persist for hours, and that is unacceptable!
  • Must have at least five on-line examples of work, and positive references.
  • Can put a damn password, that works, on this site!

This position does not pay, but you get the fabulous opportunity to put this experience on your resume!  (No, we don’t give references.  That would require learning your name.)

5 thoughts on “Cyber Guide”

  1. Fantastic, since you don’t actually give references I’ll just put it on my CV and nobody will be the wiser!

    Thanx,

    A Burner

  2. I can make your technology sing, and get your detractors all thrown in jail. I need an unlimited supply of chinese food and Jolt cola. Also, you must provide a limo for me to skitch around on my skateboard.

  3. It’s great to see a visionary group of liked minded individuals embracing the true spirit of community at Burning Man and I look forward to becoming part of this tribe in due course. Cheers from Hong Kong!

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